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palmita2000:

Dear me, Mr Holmes by ~TopHatTurtle

This is so perfect oxo

Messing around with typography in illustrator.

<3

“Summer Gold or Amber Pearl?” Jim stood in the den holding up two paint swatches that were, as far as Sebastian was concerned, the exact same shade of yellow.

Well, they were in was what was going to become the den. Previously, it had been Sebastian’s office. But as more and more of Sebastian’s work was being done off-site and anything at home was usually done in the basement, Jim had decided that the room could be put to better use.

Sebastian was not pleased with this.

“I don’t even see why we need a den,” he protested, taking his books off a shelf and putting them in a box. He blew dust off an old youth hockey trophy.

“Don’t whine so much, Bas. You can still keep your books in here. They just won’t be on those sorry excuses for shelving from… what is that, Ikea?”

“It’s practical.”

“It’s cheap and hideous.”

Sebastian rolled his eyes. Jim viewed everything that was mass produced as “cheap and hideous.” Apparently, if it wasn’t custom built or antique, it had no place in their flat. And the den would be going the custom built route. Jim was actually working with an architect and an interior designer. Sebastian thought this was slightly overkill, but he had no desire to repeat the fight that had erupted when he mentioned that opinion off handedly. “Beyond that… yellow? Seriously? It’s going to look like a nursery in here.”

“I suppose you’d rather have the place done in forest green, with mahogany and leather everywhere.” Jim pulled a face as he wandered around the room, running his fingers over windowsills and glancing around with a slightly far-off look in his eyes.

“Yeah, I would, actually.” Sebastian said with a frown, but it turned to a smile as he pulled out a small bottle of shells that they’d gathered on their not-honeymoon in Jamaica.

“Too bad. You got to pick the colors for the bedroom, now I’m doing the den. And you still haven’t answered me: Summer Gold or Amber Pearl?”

“I don’t know, babe…” he said with a sigh, carefully setting the bottle in a box. He put on his worst German accent. “Isn’t that a question for your dear Hans?”

“His name is Gunther and you know that. Now answer me.”

Sebastian folded the flaps of the box shut and stood to grab another one. “Whatever his name is, I don’t trust the guy.”

“You never trust Germans.”

“With good reason.”

“It was one bad judgment call, it’s not fair to bias yourself against an entire culture.”

“Talk to me again when you’ve been stabbed through the foot by a bloody neo-Nazi with a bayonet.” Sebastian rubbed at his left foot, feeling the slight raised bump of scar tissue.

“You’re avoiding the question.”

“And you’re being pedantic.”

“Sebastian!”

Sebastian looked up at that. Jim’s voice had suddenly lost its playful edge and there was something there that he couldn’t quite place. “What?”

“Could you please try to take this seriously?” There was tension in Jim’s shoulders and he was looking at Sebastian with a hurt expression. “I’m asking your opinion because I’m doing this for you.”

Standing and brushing dust from his knees, Sebastian crossed the room to where Jim was standing. “What do you mean, doing this for me?” he asked cautiously. “You’re taking my office away from me so you can play house with your interior designer…”

Jim looked at the floor. “You said you don’t like watching movies in the sitting room because of the angle the couch has to be at.” He raised his eyes to look at Sebastian without lifting his head. “And there’s no place to mount surround sound speakers with the way the breakfast bar is situated.”

Sebastian blinked. He had mentioned that. About six months ago. He’d just assumed Jim had ignored him as usual. He’d certainly been acting that way up until this point. “So when you say den…”

“It’s more of a media room.”

“Why didn’t you just say that, babe?” Sebastian lifted Jim’s chin before sliding his arms around his husband’s waist.

“Because it was supposed to be a surprise, you clot,” Jim mumbled, reluctantly moving into Sebastian’s embrace. “And now you’ve ruined it.”

Sebastian took the paint swatches from Jim’s hand and studied them. “Summer gold,” he said finally, meeting Jim’s lips in a kiss.

—-

Felt like writing, so I asked for one word prompts over on twitter. This one was “Yellow.”

Whatever Your Name Is by Pani_Kulek →

Trigger Warning: Rape/Non Con

Pairings: Jim Moriarty/OC, some Jim Moriarty/Sebastian Moran
Length: 94K
Summary: Jim and Sebastian are still living in the secluded small former art studio by the lake on a large estate while Jim continues to recover from his interrogation at the hands of Mycroft Holmes. Sebastian, curious about a memento of Jim’s past, asks its meaning, but Jim seems intent on remaining mysterious.

Fic rec. Just go read this. It’s absolutely fucking brilliant. The only reason you shouldn’t be reading it right this second is if you haven’t read You Can Call Me Ray and Devil’s Washbasin first.

It’s abso-fucking-lutely brilliant. THIS is how you backstory. Largely Jim’s background story and it’s just incredible.

I’m just going to sit in a corner by myself and cling to my knees because feelings and I’ll never write like Pani_Kulek.

The Rebel. [x]

(via youllfindmeatbakerstreet)

Nine to Five

“Hello, IT, this is Jim. How can I help you today?”

“Oh hi, Jim. This is Stacy down in billing.”

“Hi Stacy. What seems to be the problem?”

Stacy sat at her cubicle tapping the eraser end of a pencil against her day planner. This Jim guy sounded cute, very soft Irish accent. She wondered what he looked like. “My computer’s mouse isn’t working,” she said, shaking her mouse a few times to illustrate this point. Which, she realized, was a bit silly considering this Jim fellow couldn’t see her doing it.

There was the sound of keys tapping on the other end of the line. “Okay Stacy, I just need your employee badge number for tracking…”

She flipped her badge over to read the number. “B-oh-seven, three-eight-two. I really should memorize that,” she said with a small chuckle.

“So many numbers to remember, right?” Jim replied, and there was more typing. He voice made it sound like he was smiling, the type of guy who was always cheery. Stacy found herself smiling as well. After a moment of typing, Jim was speaking again. “Alright Stacy. H-have you tried turning your computer off completely and booting it back up?”

“No… should I do that?” She asked, chewing on the end of her pencil.

“Please…” There was a strange note in the way Jim said the word, but Stacy dismissed it.

Reaching for her mouse to shut the computer down, Stacy realized the problem with that. “Oh um… how can I shut it down without the mouse? I can’t click on the button…”

“Mmm… okay. Is your, uh, keyboard still working?”

Stacy nodded, then again realized how silly that was. “Yes, it is.”

“Okay…” Jim breathed out. “So, what I need you to do is… is press the control key, the Alt key and the delete key all at the same time… and when the window pops up, use the arrow keys to move over… over… to ‘Restart’ and h-hit enter.”

Stacy did as she was told, and once she’d gotten the computer in the process of shutting down, she drummed her fingers along her desk. “So,” she said after a minute, breaking the silence. “How’s it going in IT today?”

“Very well, thanks,” Jim replied. His voice was gentle and breathy and Stacy found she quite enjoyed listening to it. “Just a bit of multitasking.”

“Busy day, then?”

“Oh, you have no idea…” Jim said with a chuckle. “Right, tell me when it’s booted back up. Any luck?”

A few whirs, beeps and clicks and the welcome screen showed on Stacy’s computer. She moved her mouse in an attempt to click on her user icon, but the cursor didn’t budge. “No luck, still not working.”

There were muffled sounds on the other end of the line. “Ahh… okay then. Right.” Jim took a deep breath, there were a few more keystrokes and then the typing stopped. “Okay, Stacy, what I need you to do for me… is f-follow the cord on your mouse and see where it connects to the computer tower.”

Getting down onto her knees on the floor, Stacy followed the cord, cradling the phone headset on her shoulder. “It goes into the back, hold on, I gotta pull the computer out a bit.”

“Mmm… let me know when you find it.”

The back of the computer tower was covered in dust. Stacy coughed slightly, but eventually found where the mouse was attached to the computer. “Found it.”

“Okay, I need you to take the plug out and put it back in har… hard.”

There definitely was an odd note to Jim’s voice now that Stacy couldn’t quite place. She shrugged her shoulders though and did as she was told. Leaning back, she waggled the mouse to no effect. “Still nothing.”

“Harder…”

“Harder?”

“Yes…”

“I’m not sure that’ll…”

“Please… harder…”

Well, he was the IT guy, obviously he must know what he’s talking about… Stacy pushed the plug into the back of the computer harder, as instructed, and waggled the mouse again. The cursor moved, albeit a bit jumpy. “Hey! That worked! It’s not going very smoothly though.”

There was something of a grunt on the other line, and then it sounded like Jim was breathing a bit heavily. “Good… good…” He took a deep breath again and the typing resumed. “So it sounds like you have a loose USB connector,” he said, speaking quite quickly. “I’ll put in a hardware ticket and have someone bring you a replacement tower while we take a look at that one. Is there anything else I can help you with, Stacy?”

“No, that’s it. Thanks!”

“No problem, have a great day.” There was a click and the line went dead.

Well that was odd. Stacy got up off the floor and logged into her computer as best she could. One of her coworkers passed her cubicle and she called out to her “Hey, Donna?” She stopped and backed up, and Stacy continued. “Do you know that Jim guy in IT?”

“Met him once or twice, yeah. Why?”

Stacy smiled, blushing slightly. “Is he as cute as he sounds?”

“Yeah, he is a bit,” Donna replied with an amused little shake of her head. Stacy was known around the office to be a bit boy-crazy. “But apparently, according to that weirdo detective that comes into the morgue all the time, he’s gay.”

Stacy couldn’t hide her disappointment. “Damn. The cute ones always are. Thanks anyway.” She waved as Donna left.

—-

Down in the IT office, Jim was lazily stroking his fingers through Sebastian’s hair. His husband was still beneath the desk, arms resting on Jim’s thighs as he pressed kisses to Jim’s slowly softening cock.

“There’s got to be something in the sexual harassment clause about this,” Jim said.

Sebastian looked up at him, grinning. “Benefits of you having me working in Human Resources,” he said, tucking Jim back in his trousers and zipping them up. “I get to decide what those clauses mean.”

—-

Anonymous wanted: Jim has Sebastian suck him off under a table during a particularly dull meeting

See now, I actually own a functional antique typewriter. So I can make painful videos like this.

lazylee:

Decided to animate Tourist!Jim/Lolly for those who wanted Moriarty fellating things. It’s far from perfect and yet still took me a fucking age (4 days). I think I’m better off with just good ol’ illustration; it’ll be some time before I do anything on this scale again…

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princerammyz:

lascocks:

5 cents

..what if i gave him a quarter..

There is nothing about this that isn’t perfect.

(Source: eleanoroptera, via catchingspace)

yoohoopuddin:

Secrets

Richard will never forget Jim’s threats after his brother found out what had happened between him and Sebastian behind his back. 

*cough* Ivan… *cough*

(via nixiesaurus)